Haikus are not hard.
You know something that is hard?
It is my penis.
Ffff dis Blog
Posted by HP on September 15, 2008
Blogs are dumb.
Now I use this instead.
Twittin’.
Topics: my penis | No Comments »
Fffucck
Posted by HP on August 26, 2008
I’m going to start a li’l drinking game. For every resume I send out I am going to take a shot. This is going to be so much fun.
Topics: my penis | No Comments »
Oreos
Posted by HP on August 22, 2008
Oreos are good, but better when you stack them.
Topics: food | No Comments »
Fudge it
Posted by HP on August 22, 2008
I’m just going to update this thing as often as I like.
Star Wars: Force Unleashes is OFF THE HOOK (leash).
Topics: things | No Comments »
The fear
Posted by HP on August 21, 2008
It is confirmed that we have mice that can lick peanut butter off of an armed mousetrap without setting it off.
This discovery is both fascinating and terrifying.
Topics: Thursday | No Comments »
Class
Posted by HP on August 20, 2008
How come you can sip from a glass of wine in a bubble filled bathtub and it’s a classy move, but when I drink a bottle of wine in the shower everyone is up in arms?
Topics: Wednesday | 1 Comment »
the long silence is over
Posted by HP on August 19, 2008
i just came to blog about how sometimes i am really glad food exists.
Topics: Tuesday | No Comments »
It’s Ok Out
Posted by HP on June 14, 2008
My back is in poor shape.
I can barely bend over.
Naturally, I am going spelunking.
Topics: Saturday | 1 Comment »
It’s Cool Now
Posted by HP on June 13, 2008
I went to the chiropractor today.
He is an old Jewish man.
He took X-rays of my soul.
Topics: Friday | 1 Comment »
It’s Cooler
Posted by HP on June 12, 2008
My back really hurts.
I cannot bend over.
This is not cool.
Topics: Thursday | No Comments »
It’s a bit less Hot
Posted by HP on June 11, 2008
I was filing, which is something I do every 6 months (maybe).
I found a tick crawling on my button down shirt.
I don’t think this computes.
Topics: Wednesday | No Comments »
It’s Hot
Posted by HP on June 10, 2008
Today I am back in the office.
Normally I can’t stand work.
However, it is hot.
Topics: Tuesday | No Comments »
It’s Hot
Posted by HP on June 9, 2008
I took the day out of work today.
I got to have lunch with my cousin from Seattle.
It was hot.
Topics: Monday | No Comments »
It’s Hot
Posted by HP on June 8, 2008
We had a small family reunion today.
We even managed to get my cousin to come in from LA.
It was hot.
Topics: Sunday | No Comments »
It’s Ruin
Posted by HP on June 7, 2008
Topics: Saturday | No Comments »
It’s Soon
Posted by HP on June 6, 2008
Haikus are not hard.
You know something that is?
It is my penis.
Topics: Friday | 2 Comments »
It’s Doom
Posted by HP on June 5, 2008
Today I get to sit through another graduation ceromony.
Only this time it’s for 500 people I don’t care about at all.
So fun.
Topics: Thursday | No Comments »
It’s Room
Posted by HP on June 4, 2008
Gin and juice is one of my favorite treats.
I prefer cranberry juice.
Cranberry juice light is awful.
Topics: Wednesday | No Comments »
It’s Boom
Posted by HP on June 3, 2008
Today was Killdozer day.
I just learned about it.
It is amazing.
Topics: Tuesday | No Comments »
It’s Dune
Posted by HP on June 2, 2008
I hate days that feel like a complete waste.
I have so much I want to do.
But my tummy hurts.
Topics: Monday | No Comments »
It’s June
Posted by HP on June 1, 2008
I’m not a big fan of June.
I have nothing against it personally.
I just hate that it has a ‘J’ like “July.”
Topics: Sunday | No Comments »
Roopsie Doodles
Posted by HP on May 31, 2008
I haven’t filed anything for 7 months.
I thought this might be a problem.
Thank god for temps.
Topics: Saturday | No Comments »
Doopsie Doodles
Posted by HP on May 30, 2008
I want a new job, but I’m not qualified for most of them.
There’s an opening at the Harvard Hiphop archive?!
Better get my resume ready.
Topics: Friday | No Comments »
Coopsie Doodles
Posted by HP on May 29, 2008
It seems that at 6pm last night two trains on the D line crashed into one another.
Lately the green line has been a magnet for fire, crashes, and explosions.
This bodes well for my commute.
Topics: Thursday | No Comments »
Poopsie Doodles
Posted by HP on May 28, 2008
I went to the back porch to play with fire.
He saw the sparks and asked me if I had locked myself out.
I told him I didn’t not, so he left, locking the door behind him.
Topics: Wednesday | 2 Comments »
Floopsie Doodles
Posted by HP on May 27, 2008
It is almost black outside because of the thunderheads.
Why wasn’t it dark out an hour ago when I went on a walk during break?
Instead the sun was beating down on me like a fucking black retard at a Texas jail yard hoedown.
Topics: Tuesday | No Comments »
Whoopsie Doodles
Posted by HP on May 26, 2008
Looks like I forgot to update for the weekend.
Looks like no one cares.
Looks like Naria wasn’t bad.
Topics: Monday | No Comments »
Sexy Showers
Posted by HP on May 23, 2008
A lesbian wedding party is not as sexy as it sounds.
There is pretty much no nudity.
But, there is a lot of cake.
Topics: Friday | No Comments »
Smart Shower
Posted by HP on May 22, 2008
I’m all collecting letters for scholarships address to Mr. HP like I know what I’m doing.
If only they knew.
I know nothing.
Topics: Thursday | No Comments »
Penny Showers
Posted by HP on May 21, 2008
I already got my gov. money.
I put it in my savings account.
Because I have no soul.
Topics: Wednesday | No Comments »
Work Showers
Posted by HP on May 20, 2008
I can’t tell if I am busy or not at work lately.
I’ve got a lot of work to do.
Yet I still have time to post this.
Topics: Tuesday | No Comments »
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